We live in a highly social world, where it is simply expected that everyone will want to surround themselves with others, building large groups of friends and ultimately finding that one soulmate to spend the rest of our lives with. This mindset, however, overlooks one group of people – those who choose to be unsocial in a social world.
We aren’t anti-social, there is, in fact, a difference in the terms. As the Oxford Dictionary explains it, “There is some overlap in the use of the adjectives unsociable, unsocial, and antisocial, but they also have distinct core meanings.” They define the term ‘unsociable’ as: ‘Not enjoying or making an effort to behave sociably in the company of others.’ So, it’s not that we CAN’T socialize or that we AREN’T ABLE to socialize, we simply choose not to as we don’t find it enjoyable.
An ‘unsocial’ lone wolf may actually love people, and hold those that they deem worth their time closely, however, they refuse to force a social situation just to meet society’s expectations. We not only prefer being on our own in many of life’s situations but we genuinely enjoy it and don’t believe that it is a detriment to our ability to live our life to the fullest.
Many will look at us and feel sorry for us, assuming that we must live quiet, sheltered lives where we are limited in our happiness due to our limited social contact, but this couldn’t be further from the truth! By accepting that we are happier as a lone wolf we are happier, enjoying our lives to the fullest in the way that best suits our own personality!
Here are 5 benefits of being a lone wolf that are often overlooked:
You Can Discover Yourself
When you are genuinely living on your own, without someone else around to occupy your time, energy and attention, you are more likely to see all the sides of your self, including those that you may have previously hidden. You will come face to face with your shadows and unresolved issues and are left with all the time necessary to work through them. While this may be uncomfortable at first, in time you will find that you are stronger and more in touch with your true self in a way you would never have previously imagined.
You Have Complete Freedom
As a lone wolf, it’s all about you – what you want to do, what you want to eat, what you enjoy… There is no other person to include in the decision-making process and no need to compromise. Do you have a favorite restaurant? You could order in food from there every day of the week if you so choose! You have no agenda that you are forced to stick to, as you call the shots at every turn.
You Have More Time to Be Creative
Are you a creatively minded person? A study published in the ‘Journal of Family Issues’ explored the connection between creativity and love, concluding that being single can actually work in your favor! Co-author of the study James Kaufman wrote “In essence, what we found was that some creativity, like everyday creativity (the kinds of things you do every day, like cooking or making a scrapbook) was positively associated with passion, intimacy, and commitment. Whereas artistic creativity (writing, acting, painting) was negatively associated with all three love components.” So, if you’re looking to make it big in an artistic field, the lone wolf lifestyle may just be perfect for you!
You Dictate Your Own Priorities
Are you a workaholic that views your work as being the most important thing in your life? Are you heavily involved in volunteer work, choosing to dedicate your time and energy to an important cause? As a lone wolf, you have complete control over what you deem to be a priority in your life. You can choose whether you would rather spend your money on your dog than on a nicer car and no one else has a say in these decisions!
It Leaves the Door Open
While this isn’t true of all couples, we all know that couple that, once they found one another, lost all concept of their separate personalities. They no longer spend time with friends outside of their relationship and certainly aren’t interested in meeting anyone new, with their lives revolving around one another. This, obviously, will hinder your ability to meet anyone new in our life. This isn’t necessarily even saying a new romantic interest, but what if your best friend soul mate is still out there? As a lone wolf, you aren’t tied down to anyone, leaving the door open to meet new people when it feels right.