At one point or another, we have all asked ourselves what makes for a long-lasting relationship. A new study, cited in Psychology Today, may be providing us with an answer! Using a large pool of data, with samples of adults from all over the world, the study reveals the 2 most important factors.
The University of South Pacific completed the study over a 5-year period. In 2011 psychologists asked the participants to rate their partners in the following key areas on a scale of 1 to 10:
- Communication
- Conflict Resolution
- Knowledge of Partner
- Life Skills
- Self-management
- Sex and Romance
- Stress Management
The participants were then asked the same questions in 2016, ensuring that the data was consistent. This would allow them to gain some insight into which traits predicted a long lasting relationship (as they were still together) versus those traits associated with the participants whose relationships had ended during that time.
While most people would assume that sex and romance would be the biggest predictor, it didn’t make the cut! The two highest predictors of a long-lasting relationship were Communication and Knowledge of Partner.
Communication
Open and effective communication within a relationship will ensure that you are able to solve problems that may arise within your relationship together, with both parties remaining content with the final result. You can both honestly share what aspects of the solution are most important to you, and proceed with those revelations in mind.
Communication was important not only in times of trials but also in times of joy. Being honest when things are going right will allow the couple to celebrate with one another and share in one another’s happiness.
In order for any relationship to last the test of time, there will need to be a firm foundation of both honesty and trust, and neither of these can be accomplished without communication.
Knowledge of Partner
Knowing someone intimately, not just on a physical level, but also mentally and emotionally will ensure that you are aware of what they like and dislike. This will enable you to do more thoughtful things for them, as you already know that they will enjoy your efforts.
This will also allow you to avoid conversations and situations that you already know will make your partner uncomfortable or unhappy, allowing you to be more sensitive.
Most importantly, a true knowledge of your partner will allow you to understand one another for who you both really are. No relationship will last if you are having to wear a mask or hide your true self.