People are constantly telling me that I should just move on and that things will get better, but will they? Is moving on right now really the answer?
No matter who I meet or what I do my heart is still completely yours. There is no doubt about that. I am invested in you yet you are not invested in me. Yes, I am single but I am not ready to be with anyone else for awhile. I am emotionally unavailable and it will take a lot for me to get through this.
I am not quite sure how I am going to get through this but I know that I will, everyone keeps telling me that time will heal all my wounds but I am not so sure about that, to be honest. I am torn because the one person I want to go to for help is the person causing all of my pain. The solution to my problem is also the cause of it. Sure, I should be moving on. I should get that you are not interested anymore and find something else to spend my time seemingly obsessing over, right? Why can’t I?
I need some form of closure. How did you come to the realization that I was no longer your princess? Did you wake up one morning thinking you were over me, or did some pretty girl walk by and take over your mind? Why did this happen to me? We were so happy and perfect, or at least I thought we were. Nothing out of the ordinary happened and it kills me to not know WHY, why wasn’t I good enough?
I would expect this sort of thing from anyone but you, WHY? I never stopped fighting even after the end of things and I am sorry for that. Part of me holds on hoping that you will call me up one day and ask me to take you back, though I doubt that will happen. I just can’t shake the emptiness you left me with. We use to sleep so carelessly by each other’s side and now I don’t even remember your scent.
I am left with nothing. I get no call, no text, not even a like on a photo. You are a stranger to me now as I am to you. I have tried to change the way you feel and I know now that I cannot. This is our reality.
I am thankful for you and the things we have been through because I know I will grow from this and that I will be a better person because of this in the end. I would not trade my experiences for the world because I know that this is something that can and will shape me into the person I am meant to be in this life. No matter how much pain you have caused me and will continue to cause me until I am able to move on I still believe that you are the best thing that has ever happened to me.