While it may seem difficult to love, or be loved by someone who is suffering from depression, it actually can be quite rewarding as well. However, speaking from a depressed person’s point of view, it is not a task for the weak, but if you think you’re up for it, this is what you will need to understand.
1. We Will Often Listen Much More than We Speak
This isn’t because we don’t want to talk about the thoughts inside of our head, or that we don’t want to interact with you, there is just so much going on that we don’t know where to begin. And then, there is always the fact that our thoughts, which drag us down constantly, may also pose a burden for you.
2. We Didn’t Choose to Be Depressed
While our inactivity, quiet demeanor, or constant sadness may appear to be a behavioral problem that we can control, it’s not. More often that not, we feel as though we are paralyzed inside of our own mind and body, and no matter how much we want to feel normal, we can’t.
3. Our Emotions Tend to Control Us
Sadness isn’t the only emotion that comes along with depression. So, when we become frustrated and angry, please don’t just brush it off as PMS. Also, don’t assume that we are upset at you, as our demeanor probably has more to do with what is going on inside of our head than it does you.
4. We Will Try as Hard as We Can to Become Productive
Depression may make us feel lethargic, and make us disinterested. However, when we are in love, we will try to do whatever we can to be productive and human. We may cook dinner, make the bed, wash the dishes, and clean the house just so that you know we are trying.
5. We May Be More Affectionate than the Average Woman
We are highly sensitive and loving individuals. And one of the major ways that we know to show you how much we love you is to shower you will affection.
6. You May Never Understand How Much We Appreciate You
When you are depressed, self-loathing is something to be expected, and it is this hatred for ourselves that makes us appreciate how much you love us. Not only that, but obviously, you know that we need a bit more love and affection than the average woman, yet you stay. This means everything to us.
7. We Require More
We will seek validation through your words. Some days, when you want to go and be amongst people, we will want to hog you to ourselves in bed all day. Cuddling, hugs, kisses and one on one time will be something we need constantly.
8. We Need More Alone Time
Don’t take offense when we ask for our space. Sometimes, we may even just leave for a few days, but we will always come back. Our batteries need to recharge, no matter how much we love you, and if you allow us that time, you will be glad you did.
9. We Are Constantly Inside of Our Own Heads
No matter how much we want to pay attention to everything going on outside of our mind, we may get lost in our heads. It is because of this, that we will also over analyze everything that is going on. Our depression will pick everything apart to find deeper meaning, and we may even speculate as to whether you actually love us or not.
10. Your Experience Is Never the Same As Ours
While you obviously have good intentions when you tell us about that ‘one time when I was depressed, too,’ please don’t. You can empathize with us, you can comfort us, and you can listen, but please don’t suppress how we are feeling. Don’t compare it to something else, and don’t make it something its not.